These channelings are a better diary for me than I could write, since the guides often read my mind better than I do. They gently restored my sanity one day with the following words. I would be very surprised if elements of my expansion of identity weren't happening to many people.
There are some people with whom you don't have to build a relationship. It is there. There are other people that you have to get to know.
We have all along been watching you carefully, Cathee, to see if you can handle what has been said to you and the kinds of experiences we have been leading you and Peter in together. We see that despite some hesitation that still exists in you, you trust us and you trust him.
What you are discovering is that your experience goes much deeper and farther than your conceptual grasp would allow, were you not following our guidance and your own inner promptings beyond the limits of language and your current theological frameworks as they relate to humans. We applaud this ability of yours to go beyond the known willingly, joyfully, and with gusto. If there is a limitation left, it is your deep desire to have everything make sense in a clear, somewhat linear framework. This we cannot give you. We can only promise that the mind is being stretched and will be stretched, and will become so elastic as to doubt its own ability to understand. It is like a child who has a very rich experience but depends on an adult to take care of many matters that affect its existence. Your mind realizes more and more its own limitations, and its dependence on Spirit as manifest in your Higher Self to take care of it. Then it can play freely, and enjoy trying to understand what already has been experienced, and is being experienced. So here we go.
Deep within the Earth, as we have told you previously, there are tremendous changes taking place. We told you that these changes relate directly to the changes that you are experiencing in every facet of your life, but the energies are coming up from within the earth to be greeted by those who are called to greet them consciously. We have told you that you and Peter form a male/female wholeness that is able to greet these energies almost as a unit. We are grateful for your dedication to this task. We do not blame you for being very curious about this special partnering between the human ones greeting the devic ones [nature spirits] and the ETs as you experience them in their frequency.
There is a dance here. Part of the reason it is hard for you to see this clearly, in order to even bring forth this information, is simply because part of the dance is the ability to go so fully into the energies and spread your identity out so that you are not feeling yourself so much as a separate identity, but feeling the oneness between all. Once you select with whom you want to blend in a channeling session, you are blended. There is not a separate sense of self in a blending, and it is hard to say who is speaking. This is different from other times when you know exactly who you're channeling. We've told you that we wish for you to work more from a blending than from this more linear sense of channeling an entity.
And so here you are. You are feeling Peter's presence with you. At least that's how your mind can conceive of it. More accurately, you often feel the blending that contains you and Peter and others, such as Mud. We have continually directed you to feel this blending, and this you can do quite readily and are willing to let go into more and more whole-heartedly, with less fear. We are talking around this, but perhaps by what we have said you can see how your linear mind is wishing to understand a phenomenon in which it is not there. Your mind arises out of your experience of yourself. These channelings and the group mind that contains these teachings arise out of the group merging. It is a collective mind that speaks to you when you're channeling—through you, to you, from you—it just is, and you somehow are moved to move your lips and speak. Sometimes you filter it through your own mind more than other times.
We have pointed out to you that at times you have sensed that there is only so far that words can go, and that you need to learn to live right at the edge of where words can go in your experience. This is no easy task. You must let go and truly be the blended unit of consciousness and then speak through your separate body from that place, as you are doing now. We say, "We think this. We experience this." At moments when the blending is complete, you are part of the "we."
This has been somewhat of a confusion to both you and Peter, where you can close a session but the "we" does not go away. The "we" that is you and Peter as an entity does not dissolve back into the two. In fact, it really doesn't feel any more like a choice to be part of this "we" with Peter—it feels like who you are. This is who you are. Perhaps you experience the confusion more because you think about it in light of your tendency to not "do boundaries" well in relationships. Since this has been an issue for you, then it's the mirror from which you look at what's happening here with Peter. There are other vantage points in your life that would make it equally clear to you that there is something going on here that is different from any of your prior experiences. This both thrills you and enriches you and fills your life with a sense of love, and it makes you feel more alienated from the products of your own mind—the ability of your own mind to explain. This is why we speak to you today.
Part of the mishmash of the cultural concepts you've been given is the idea of falling in love. This doesn't exactly feel like falling in love to you either. It's not fun like that—this feels very serious and irrevocable, unchangeable, because it feels like it has always been and always will be and is. So here is your most profound experience that you've had in this lifetime of "we."
We sense that you wish to integrate this "we" into your experience of "me," rather than vice versa—integrating "me" into your experience of "we." It needs to go this direction, the smaller integrating into the larger, wider vastness. It can't go the other way—it doesn't fit the other way. You can't pour a tub of water into a glass. It doesn't work. You need to pour the glass into the understanding of the tub, and then of the ocean. We as this greater group are here mainly at this time to help you with your comfort level as your ego discovers it is "we." There is great value in the teachings given to you and the experiences you had on the Old Ute Trail to try to comprehend you and Peter coming together as one, and to then love the one of nature consciousness, and together go beyond that human/nature polarity, finding a deeper huge "we" in that experience of oneness. There was great value in it for the sake of bridging the human/nature gap, and we still hold this as highest priority here. The secondary value that came out of that, however, was that you discovered the we that is Peter and Cathee. This is also very precious, which made it an all around wonderful exercise for all involved.
You cannot go back. We will make that very clear, because it will save you a lot of trying. You cannot pretend that you have not experienced the Peter/Cathee "we." It is undoable. What we wish is for you to become more comfortable with it. This is extremely important. This is why we are willing to spend all the time with you that you wish us to, to try to fluff the pillows and help you settle into this.
We know you wish to see the bigger picture of how the we that is you and Peter fits into the universe, since this is the first "we" you really know, and therefore you know that your perspective on it is very limited. Ironically perhaps, this is something that nature can teach you. Nature is a vast we. There is not a sense of separateness between the tree and the rock it is growing beside. They are expressions of "we." The "I" that you feel normally is quite unique. It is not a common experience in the All That Is to experience oneself as so separate. We have told you that both you and Peter are not quite human, not quite nature—something in between. So you can go first in communicating to other humans that we is real. That we is something that you're able to experience. That we is beautiful, not something to fear. The entire bulk of humanity is moving closer to a sense of we, and this is the hope for your global problems, actually. You have always had a sense of we.
We have told you that this relationship has a unique potential, and part of that potential is that you are a we. Therefore, we don't have to, as we would with many other human beings, spend years working with you to open you up to the potential for we. You are we already. Therefore you can be on the leading edge here in helping others know what we is like, and know not to be afraid of we, or love. Love is a universal experience, and love is the experience of we.
We love you greatly. This will all make sense as time unfolds.
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© Cathee Courter and Peter MacGill, text and photos. All rights reserved.